I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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