I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I have feelings that need drinking.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
