the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
