He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
