Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
