remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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