Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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