This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
