Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
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This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
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you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question