His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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