I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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