David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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