check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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