He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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