Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Randomize