a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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