do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I touched a dick in church today
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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