do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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