At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
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West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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