their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize