I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
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Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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