That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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