I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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