I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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