i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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