All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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