Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
where does the pee come out of this thing
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
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And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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