Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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