Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
third nipple confirmed
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
