dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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