I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
