but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize