i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
