I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize