Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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