Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
so let's talk penis.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
