she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
