why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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