Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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