Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
