Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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