About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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