Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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