i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize