Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
