dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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