the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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