the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
