if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
ok first of all what the fuck
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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