then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
